Please cling to your one true leader

There may be those who are now singing a song about Republicans finding new leadership. Who are these people, and what do they have on their pizza? DeSantis. The Satan. Could it be more obvious? Do not be deceived by the followers of the Anti-Trump. Who even knew where Florida was before Trump made it famous?

There are also those who, in this critical hour, have concluded that maybe Americans actually value democracy. That they aren’t ready to hand over the nation to people who want to destroy voting rights, human rights, and every other right that’s been piled up since someone knocked out the stele of Hammurabi. (Don’t worry about what that is. Not important.)  You tell them that Americans have never cared about these things. Or that they’d ever go to war to protect them. Have the seen the price of sausage rolls at Walmart?

All of these Brutuses. Bruti. Bruten. Whatever. All these so-called Republicans are pulling out the knives and demanding that everyone find unity over the body of the one man who showed them how with enough money and an angry base, laws don’t matter. Have they forgotten so soon? Et tu, Sean Hannity?

Don’t listen to them. You like clinging, so cling. Hold tight to Trump and show your loyalty by striking out at all these others. In fact, this would be an absolutely excellent time to show them what you think by starting a whole new party and running in opposition to the party of weak-kneed Trump deniers. Call it the Golden Throne Party. 

The point is, now is not the time for Republican unity, not it if it means abandoning one single belief of your multi-layered Q-centric, Trump as messiah fantasies. Not when that worked so well in 2017, and 2018, and 2019, and 2020, and 2022. Stick with the plan. Stick with the man. And give those traitor Republicans a big smack in the ballot box.

Maybe don’t even go. After all, the only election that counts is the one that happens in your hearts.



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